


Here Comes The Airship

by SkeletalSailor



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Age Regression/De-Aging, Baby!Ignis, Comedy, Crack, Gen, Humor, Noctis is a potty mouth
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-29
Updated: 2018-01-29
Packaged: 2019-03-11 01:04:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,233
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13513512
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SkeletalSailor/pseuds/SkeletalSailor
Summary: Ignis gets inflicted with a status ailment that leads to him being de-aged to four years old, and the others have to look after him. Ignis is a well-mannered child, though, so it's no problem!... Until you try to get him to eat his vegetables.





	Here Comes The Airship

**Author's Note:**

> Kinkmeme fill: Deaged Ignis won't eat his vegetables (https://ffxv-kinkmeme.dreamwidth.org/4398.html?thread=8391214)
> 
> This was absurdly fun to write and child Ignis is my new favorite thing.

"So it's going to be about seventy-two hours until it wears off on it's own," Gladio informed as he stepped up to the group after speaking with the clerk.

"There's no way to speed up the process?" Noctis frowned.

"What, you can't go without Ignis doting on you for three days?" Gladio smirked and Noctis rolled his eyes.

"I can do just fine without Ignis, _thank you very much_ ," Noctis huffed, "I just... don't like the idea of taking care of a _kid_ for three days."

Monsters inflict status ailments; that was nothing new. Poison, Petrification, Confusion, even Toad, they'd seen it all. Or, at least, they _thought_ they had. Then Ignis got struck during battle and...

Well, now he was about four years old.

"It's not like he's hard to take care of, you know?" Prompto chuckled, looking down at the bespectacled boy beside him. "I mean, look at him. He's adorable."

"It's _Ignis_ , Prompto," Noctis glared. "For every ounce of adorableness, you know he's just going to be three times more stubborn. Do you _really_ wanna go through that hell?"

"Watch your language in front of the child, Noct," Gladio growled, gently slapping the prince across the back of the head.

 

* * *

 

 

It's not like Ignis was a particularly stressful child to deal with throughout the day; he was extremely quiet for his age, and kept his nose in whatever picture-filled book he could find. As such, Gladio made a point to lock up any naughty magazines laying about.

Ignis was barely even a child, really. He was more like a mini adult. He was polite, well-mannered, and, thank the Astrals, was too young to make his usual cringe-worthy puns.

There were no real problems; they just had to avoid fighting for a couple of days so they wouldn't be putting Ignis in danger.

But then, they ran into another, _completely unexpected_ issue come supper time.

"Come _on_ , man," Noctis pleaded. "Just eat."

Ignis stared, then glanced down at the vegetables on his plate, then stared at Noctis again with a little bit of a disgusted look.

Gladio and Prompto couldn't help but let out small chuckles and giggles as they watched the twenty-year-old prince stare down his four-year-old advisor.

"Ugh," Noctis groaned. "I know they suck, but just try them. I hate them, but I'm sure you'll love them."

"Nuh-uh," Ignis shook his head, reaching to grab his book again. Noctis quickly reached over, snatching the book before he could bury his face in the colorful pages as an escape.

"No reading until you eat your veggies," Noctis crossed his arms. "There's not even that many on your plate."

Ignis frowned, looking down at his plate before gently shoving it away. "Not hungry."

"Wha--" Noctis was taken aback, glancing back at the other two men. He whispered harshly, "Can you _believe_ this little shit?!"

"Swear jar," Ignis reminded casually, still lightly glaring at the greens upon his otherwise pristine plate.

"You know, we always have Cup Noodles," Gladio stepped up, smirking when Ignis' eyes lit up excitedly.

"No," Noctis glared. "No, _no, **no**._ If we feed him junk food he's going to kick our asses the moment he's back to normal."

"Swear jar," Ignis reminded again.

"I will put more vegetables on your plate if you keep doing that," Noctis rolled his eyes.

"Go ahead," Ignis dared. "They're just gonna sit there when I don't eat them, you know."

Noctis' mouth gaped, not sure of a response. He knew Ignis wouldn't be rude as a child... But he definitely retained his sass.

Noctis sighed, sitting down next to Ignis. "Come on, buddy, what's it gonna take to get you to eat?"

Ignis remained quiet, staring and shaking his head.

With a resigned sigh, Noctis reached over, grabbing Ignis' fork and stabbing a piece of broccoli viciously.

"Heeeere comes the airship," Noctis moved the fork wildly around, smirking when Ignis' eyes followed the vegetable. " _Nyoooooooaaaaammm_."

Noctis divebombed the 'airship' towards Ignis' mouth, pouting when he didn't open his mouth. The 'airship' simply rested on the boy's lips.

"I _said_ ," Noctis cleared his throat, reeling the fork back. " _Nyooooooooooooaaaaaammm_."

Upon the second attempt at a landing, Ignis still didn't open his mouth. Noctis pouted, nudging gently. " _NYOOM_."

Noctis' expression fell when Ignis stared at him, utterly unimpressed and not amused by his antics. With a sigh, he got up from the seat, taking the plate with him. "Fine. You win. No vegetables."

Ignis made a pleased sound as Noctis walked off with the disgusting plantation-filled plate.

Noctis smirked as he stabbed more vegetables onto the fork. He glanced back, grinning when Ignis' attention seemed completely distracted.

With a grunt, he flung the fork. " ** _HERE COMES THE AIRSHIP_**."

Ignis turned at the shout, jumping with fright when Noctis warped to the thrown fork. Noctis smirked; Ignis was startled, and all he had to do was shove the bite in his mouth, right?

As it turned out, Ignis had an iron will even when frightened... and kept his mouth firmly shut as he stared wide-eyed at the prince.

"Noct!" Prompto shouted, dashing up to snatch the fork from Noctis' hand. "Warping doesn't fix everything in life!"

"No kidding," Noctis pouted. "I thought _for sure_ that would work."

"Dude, please, please, _pleeeeaaaase_ leave the parenting to Lady Lunafreya," Prompto begged, rubbing his forehead. "You clearly aren't cut out for this."

"And you are?" Noctis raised a skeptical eyebrow.

" _I'm_ not going to warpstrike a damn child!" Prompto argued.

"Swerr jerr," Ignis mumbled, muffled as he tried to keep his lips shut.

" _Thank you_ , Iggy," Prompto huffed his appreciation, walking over to reclaim the vegetables and sitting next to Ignis in Noctis' stead. "I'll buy you a new book if you eat your veggies."

"Prompto, you can't bribe him to eat his vegetables," Gladio pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Why not?" Prompto pouted. "If it works, it works, doesn't it?"

Ignis shook his head. "It won't. No vegetables."

"Awww, come on," Prompto nudged the mini advisor. "How do you know you'll hate them if you don't try them?"

"I just do," Ignis pouted.

"How about this," Prompto snapped his fingers. "I'll make Noct eat vegetables to prove they're good. Then will you try them?"

"What!?" Noctis shouted. "Don't drag me into your bargaining!"

Prompto rolled his eyes. "Fine. If neither of you will eat it, I guess I will." Prompto lifted the broccoli to his mouth, biting the vegetable off of the fork with a comical 'nom' sound. "Mm, this is _really_ good!"

Ignis blinked as Prompto stabbed another piece of broccoli, popping it into his mouth. Prompto spoke in an exaggerated tone that was obvious to everyone who wasn't a literal child. "This is delicious! You _suuuuure_ you don't want any, Iggy?"

Ignis looked skeptical as he glanced back and forth between the broccoli and Prompto. Then, made grabby hands at the fork in Prompto's hand.

Noctis went still as he watched Ignis clumsily stab at a stem before munching it apprehensively.

"See?" Prompto grinned. "It's awesome, isn't it?"

Ignis nodded as he chewed the bite in his mouth.

Noctis frowned, huffing as he stared at the ground. After all his attempts, after all his trouble, Prompto of all people was the one to get through to him.

Ignis may have been the child, but right now, Noctis was the one who wanted to cry.


End file.
